The Truth about Failures

The Truth about Failures

Heye all – im a stickler for the truth so when folks keep slinging falsehoods I feel compelled to dispel the b.s. and cut to the chase.  They do this for a reason ya know – they pull out the lamest and blameyest games they can when they are…. Failing!

But since so many folks come late to the party or go about life with their eyes closed – we shall review the facts.

What has failed?

1. Oralism FAILS

Dismally according to the Babbidge report and the ICED 2010 New Era Agreement.  The campaign against American Sign Language and other natural signed languages FAILS.

2. Mainstreaming FAILS

Abysmally according to the Commission on the Education of the Deaf and the latest statistics that don’t show a big gain in literacy skills

3. Artificial Sign Systems FAIL

SEE I, SEE II, LOVE I, LOVE 2, Cued speech, and sim-com cuz very few folks continue using those artificial systems past the period of forced servitude

4. Cochlear implants FAIL

complications, inconsistent results, recalls, lawsuits, corporate deviance, etc and the things still can’t reliably make a Deaf being hear equally to a Hearing being.  Sure there are a few stellar poster children but there were a few of those during the first wave of Oralism too.  By and large  the data is showing that AT BEST all CI do is elevate a Deaf child to being a hard of hearing child and instead of elevating that usually tosses them into limbo land and they get lost in the downstream.  Its a mighty expensive built-in ipod and it has some worrisome side effects.

Not to mention the deaths, infections, paralysis, chronic headaches years later, the skin breakdown at the magnetic site, etc

Sovona , the Swiss Hearing devices co., has chopped several major big wigs out after insider trading was revealed.   It seems spreading the falsehood that all is well with Advance Bionics cochlear implants and they should be back on the market as asap is not cool with the share holders

Not even AG Bell Association wants to be associated with sued and fined CI companies (Advanced Bionics and Cochlears America) via their Circle Alliance Partnership

and some of the Cochlear Implants fail HOT!

5. I King Jordan’s plans to have Jane Fernandes replace him as president of Gallaudet to usher in the New World order FAILED

see Unity for Gallaudet protest 2006

6. Keeping AG Bell Dorm Name and Revised Plaque at NTID FAILS

see Orange & Brown Coalition

7. AB 2072 FAILS

see the governor’s veto

8. Cutting 4201 Schools’ budget FAILS

see the NY State revised and finalized budget

9. Destroying the DBC, CAD, AFA, and Deafhood Foundation FAILS

see they are alive and well and busy

10. Deafread and DVTV attempt to get Purple back as a sponsor FAILS

11. (added 4/30/2011) Gallaudet’s board of trustee’s attempt to maintain status quo falsehood of “Hearing knows best” by appointing a Hearing non-signing President of Gallaudet FAILS thanks to the Deaf President Now protest of 1988

12. (added 4/30/2011) Seattle, Washington’s attempt to whitewash the unjust and unjustifiable murder of a partially Deaf First nation woodcarver, John T. Williams, FAILS (family is awarded $1.5 million in a settlement)

To Summarize  – Falsehoods F A I L

Truthforce / Soulforce – is victorious, think of it always  (see Gandhi)

There are more failures but I’m in a rush

You get the picture.  I.E. the big one – I hope and not the wee one.

The systems  have failed our peeps – miserably, relentlessly, unendlessly – while the byproducts of these systems have survived and survivors generally come in three shapes and sizes:

  1. folks who combat injustice and live to do good
  2. folks who succumb to injustice and live to do bad
  3. folks who give up and give in and have a death of a spirit

for some waking up is hard to do – much easier to kick the dog than fight da power

hence they put on their cloaks of falseHOODS and get a busy spinning.

“A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.”
~ Winston Churchill

Be a b.s. buster folks and do NOT avert your eyes from the real prize – social justice and equality for all.  Shed a light to dispel the falsehoods and combine our talents and good hearts to fight the truly unjust systems at work.



36 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Penny
    Apr 25, 2011 @ 19:02:14

    One correction here. You and others may disagree with me and may refute but it will not change my mind. The Bay Area CA is bringing New World Order back into fold which Dr. King tried to do in the very first place. The same team who were involved with AB2072 invited Marlee Matlin to Gala Banquet to introduce Howard Rosenblum as our NAD CEO. The same team is in awe and admire Marlee Matlin’s for her devotion and time to contribute million dollars to Starkey Hearing Aids Foundation. The million dollars should have gone to NAD or United Nations to help Deaf people in third world. Too many hyprocrisy and manipulators in our community. They are just like hearing people from systems. They are no difference than them.

  2. ASLElla
    Apr 25, 2011 @ 19:04:14

    Excellent!!! Even tho I know all that, it’s good to be reminded ad to see all in one place! Thanks for being a stickler for TRUTH for our community.

  3. Penny
    Apr 25, 2011 @ 19:10:57

    Ella- You need to stick to the truth! You like to confuse people. You need to stop that too. You don’t practice what you preach. You mocked Barry in front of the whole wide world that he values ears/speak and look at you for not standing up against your group—your favorite people who welcome Marlee Matlin who also value ears/speak like Barry does. You give constantly giving mixed messages. Pity you!

  4. handeyes
    Apr 25, 2011 @ 21:09:25

    my goodness – how did marlee matlin get invited to this thread????

    Penny – i hope u dont intend to engage me with dialogue and then ask to poof all ur comments later like u done before re: Amy EC when it was supposed to be a thread about DR / DVTV guidelines etc

    now a couple of things i need to understand:
    1. how do you define New World Order ala King

    2. are you saying that ALL the bay area folks are gaga over marlee and starkey?

    3. re: your dissing ella in the comment above – im gonna leave it up so folks can see how other folks play things here in the wicked web but i will also say NOT COOL

    this thread is about TRUTHS and u have made some DECLARATIVEs as if they were truths and facts when in fact they are simply your OPINION.

    and i will add – u have FAILED to make your argument successfully

    i am a PROUD member of the NAD. i believe the NAD is waking up

    i assume (but assumptions are dangerous) that marlee was invited to the gala before the NAD knew about her fundraising BIG bucks for Starkey and not for them (boo)

    Give me celebrities who are political activists or who will stand for their people at a personal cost to themselves or their careers ANY TIME – they are my heros.

    harry belafonte, base ball players – Hank Greenberg and Sandy koufax

    etc – i cant think of the others right this minute but i know i have stumbled upon others in my readings and thought – wow COURAGE

    good COURAGE

    the greater good

    these r the kinda folks i will pay to sit near at a gala



  5. handeyes
    Apr 25, 2011 @ 21:11:49


    speaking of good courage …. ; )

    de nada

    and thank u too



  6. Dianrez
    Apr 25, 2011 @ 21:19:02

    Some might jump on this as oversimplified and hurry in to cite cases and articles that refute parts of it.

    The truth is that all of this is TRUE for MANY people who were disserved and pushed aside to spotlight those that benefited somewhat from the methods intended to make them hear and speak. Are we to disregard the ones that were failed?

    Note: General society does not want to hear about those that don’t hear and speak. They prefer to believe that deafNESS is curable and can be made invisible. No matter, only a few were failed? How about hundreds and hundreds? Thousands, even?

    These people deserve a full say in these matters, and their full place in society, not to be consigned to the scrap pile with an “Oh well can’t win them all”.

    They deserve more than to be buried under a pile of lies.

  7. Dianrez
    Apr 25, 2011 @ 21:32:14

    Marlee Matlin as a topic certainly doesn’t belong in this discussion. We don’t know the details of her involvement with Starkey, but it is probably mutually beneficial both for herself and for Starkey, and is a figurehead for the company’s charitable branch.

    As such, criticizing her is like criticizing someone for working as an employee. She’s awesomely effective and has to help support a family. Perhaps in the future those credentials will be used to spearhead an effort for NAD, Gallaudet, etc, or a new endeavor entirely.

  8. Penny
    Apr 25, 2011 @ 22:50:54

    Patti, my goodness! I concur. Marlee Matlin was invited by the very same team who made noises to CA State to revoke AB 2072 bill. Isn’t that ironic? You can look at the video presented by the VERY same people from region 4 in CA. I don’t have time to make up stories.

    I received few (Not many) from Bay Area people that they agreed with me and even said how very brave I was for bringing attention to the public.

    I have no idea who will be attending to this gaga next month. I am tired of seeing Ella and her group except for me to raise concerns about Region 4 people and others who give mixed messages and etc. it is not my character to cover for them if I see something wrong. I don’t like lies, betray and etc. They do not fit me.

    Ella and her group have the same ole cycle pattern to make loud noises WHEN they see others who don’t have same values with them for giving misinformation or misleading to the public. Ella and others know very well of Marlee’s involvement with Starkey Foundation. They don’t like her work but if their own group is inviting Marlee Matlin they would not share concerns to the public…everything has to be hush hush hush but when people do not have same values with Ella and her group they make vlogs about them. This does not make sense to me and it is very mean too.

    Marlee went to Starkey Foundation the billionaire looking office on LIVE TV to give him 1 million dollars check to help kids to hear birds singing and mentioned nothing about ASL.

    If the same team did not cry to CA State to revoke bill AB 2072 then rest assures you that I would not create a fuss here.

    You called this wicked web? It is NOT even an opinion. It is 100% FACT. I did my homework. Pls review the AB 2072 team people what they said what they wanted on the bill and etc and now they are inviting Marlee to the gaga and knowing what she is doing to millions of children out there. I am raising my eyebrows. I hope and pray that Tony Mendosa CA Assemblyman read this.

    I did not say bad things about NAD. I even fell in love with the video what Howard made recently. I even showed the video to my family. They said brilliant and excellent marketing. You do not know me, Ms. Patti Durr.

    Marlee made many statements about Starkey Foundation on TV and even mentioned about it when she was on Dancing with Stars and Home Makeover. Don’t say my comments here are opinion. I am not a stupid woman.

    You made noises to PURPLE to cease sponsorship to Tayler because of audism and other reasons he practiced and he had done to our community and now you said it is ok for Marlee and other people like her to be noticed regardless of their wrong mission…false leading about our community and Deaf children.

    Help me, Lord!

  9. handeyes
    Apr 25, 2011 @ 23:15:56

    Heye Dianrez –

    yep – “who speaks for them” and them is us really truly in many ways … on many days

    as always – thanks for ur comments and insight

    re: marlee – well i think ms. penny is gonna make me put my thinking cap fully on so we will see see what me conscience tells



  10. handeyes
    Apr 26, 2011 @ 00:03:44

    heye penny

    re: who invited Marlee. someone told me it was Howard that invited her cuz they is both from Chicago but i confess i know little to NOTHING, nada, zilts on the inside scoop

    so if ur issue is with 4 folks who promoted the NAD gala in a vlog – then u should challenge them directly

    u seem to think:
    1. ALL OPPOSE AB 2072 folks should oppose all listening devices and all folks who promote their use and organizations and co.s that promote their use

    FACT: Oppose AB 2072 was NOT about opposing listening devices but rather about opposing excluding ASL + English and opposing mandating that parents get their info about their options from an audiologist and having so much representation from the pro- oral / aural ONLY and medical profession / deafness camp on the panel for the brochure

    2. u think that ella was the mastermind behind AB 2072 and she is turning a blinds eye to the corruption of Deaf cultural values by having marlee at the NAD gala honoring howard rosenblum

    FACT: ella was involved in oppose AB 2072 but she was not THE leader and she does not have any role in making marlee a part of the NAD gala. i have not had any communication with ella on this subject but i can safely assume that Ella would have no part in bringing Marlee Matlin to that gala.

    3. i doubt Mendoza reads my blog

    FACT: u can email him your comment so u wont have to rely on a hope and a prayer that he see it

    4. You stated “You do not know me, Ms. Patti Durr.”

    FACT: u are correct. I do not know you.

    I do know u have said harsh things against tayler & Miska Zena before here and there but other than that i dont know jack-crap-about ya.

    5. Re: marlee having promoted starkey on other programs (Dancing with the Stars, Extreme Makeovers programs, and now the Celebrity Apprentice)

    FACT: yes u r right she has

    6. Re: Your not being a stupid woman

    FACT: i never said u were. u might want to chill a bit on that defensiveness.

    7. re: your comment stating i (patti) “said it is ok for Marlee and other people like her to be noticed regardless of their wrong mission”

    FACT: wow – where did i say it was OK? I did not say it was ok but you are right i have not said that it is NOT OK either.

    u can bet that if NAD was sponsoring a telethon that Marlee was running to fund raise for Starkey i would make BIG noise

    u can bet that if starkey was sponsoring the gala id be like WTH and loud about it

    i would go just a wee bit wild – not cuz im anti-hearing devices. i am anti-corporate greed and im anti-audism etc and i love Veditz and the NAD

    but since my understanding is that Howard invited Marlee and its Howard’s party and the invitation and acceptance was probably long before the latest BAM by marlee of promoting a co. that is hawking its wares in developing countries where most folks will junk the stuff after a bit cuz batteries are hard to come by, moisture affects things, audiology visits are few and far to get to, etc etc – its a bit awkward for me to say wrong bad bad bad NAD

    but i will now cuz u have raised the valid point of we dont need no celebrity that hasnt INVESTED in promoting ASL and Deaf culture – which is the primary roots and core of NAD

    marlee – divest from starkey

    so i will join my yelp with urs penny – only if it is NOT singling out individuals unjustly and instead looking at the systems.

    i also will be honest with you – i do not feel that marlee’s appearance at the gala is a HUGE BIGGIE

    its unfortunate but its a one time event for a few minutes and its not really what the gala is about.

    i hope u will consider some type of positive letter writing campaign to inform Marlee of how her pushing Starkey’s ware results in misrepresentation of Deaf ASL folks needing to be FIXED in the media and that aint cool

    penny – i do thank u for this dialogue.



  11. Penny
    Apr 26, 2011 @ 01:11:46

    I have already challenged them and they did not bother to challenge back. That is okay with me. Why? because it is nothing new as it always been like that to our community and elsewhere for so many years.

    At first they OPPOSED AB 2072—ALL OF IT but they realized that it wouldn’t work that way in the real Politics world so they made amends and changes. They did a fabo job.

    I have never said Ella was the leader or mastermind behind AB 2072 or NAD Gala. Please do not put words into my mouth. I have never said that about her or to her. I said that she and her group always make a lot of noises in vlogs when they see vloggers/bloggers do not share same values with them. I have never seen her or her group make vlog when they see each other make mistakes… or give misleading info etc. Do I need to explain more? If you do not agree with me then please let us leave this alone.

    I won’t bother to contact Mendoza…just hoping he would read it here.

    Yes I have said harsh things to Tayler and Miska Zena. I have never humiliated Tayler by calling him Brian. I will never make fun of his name. I have always called him Tayler. He always replied to my e-mails. I am always puzzled when others said he never replied to their e-mails and etc because he always replied mine in timely manner. ALWAYS! Not only that he is always nice to me in e-mails. Yes there was one time I was really upset and said nasty but I am glad he did not shut me off and never have. He always accepted my comments too.

    Thanks for agreeing with me that you don’t know me so pls don’t make assumptions about my comments next time. Ask me if my comments are not clear or you need more info from me. Your language was smart aleck so I had to defend myself. If you treat me like an adult then I would have approach you differently.

    I feel that I am entitled to share about Marlee Matlin and what my community is doing with her. They are educated and they can make final decision about this if my concerns are valid or not or should not be concerned then it is up for them to decide. I did not name people but I used phrase “system” Region 4 in Bay Area and they are the same people who fought for AB 2072. I am nice for not naming everyone here.

    It is huge biggie for me about the gala event next month because I don’t like to give mix messages. I hate fake. This is how I feel.

    Thanks for the dialogue.

  12. handeyes
    Apr 26, 2011 @ 02:28:07

    thank u for coming back and clarifying things

    i did ask u clarifying questions and some of them u did not answer

    re: the “leader” bit – it may be because you kept saying “HER group” as if she owned or controlled or spearheaded it – instead of the OPPOSE AB 2072 group or movement or efforts

    i do see ur point re: folks in general not challenging their own.

    i am committed to challenging folks when i see injustices and i appreciate when folks truthfully and caringly call me on stuff. i have challenged folks on both ends of the rainbow rhetoric and pretty much give meself a daily dose of challenging. I have done shout outs when folks were unjustly trashing folks i dont exactly see eye to eye with. MLK jr said injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. I think i have even defended u a wee bit here and there and i hope u would do the same for me should the spirit move u and it be the just, right and good thing to do.

    we should not sell our conscience just cuz we want a seat a the gala

    i am glad u have gotten prompt responses from Tayler in the past. If we are to apply ur same standard for what u r expecting of the bay area folks – then wouldnt we call upon u not to support tayler in light of entries that promote audism or attacks on the Deaf community via DR and DVTV? I do not call upon u to do this. I will NOT call upon u to do this.

    I only point this out that u are impassioned about Marlee, Starkey and NAD and you are calling upon on others to share your passion and some may not. Just as i do not hold the expectation that everyone must be in boycott of DR / DVTV until they have inclusive guidelines that prohibit targeting Deaf ASL or natural signed language folks as an ethnicity

    It does not necessarily mean that folks are turning a blinds eye or exhibiting favoritism or sending mixed messages.

    It is an utter truth that Tayler does not reply to some emails but does reply to others. It is an utter truth that Tayler twice gave me assurances he would be revising the DR / DVTV guidelines to include audism and/or Deaf folks as a cultural / linguistic group. It is an utter truth that when i knew Tayler he went by his first name. It is an utter truth that Tayler has written and distributed falsehoods about me. It is an utter truth that i do not support or condone any bashing against tayler and i have nothing to do with the Stop DR/DVTV Facebook and the Deaf Cyberbullying Twitter. It is an utter truth that i care a great deal for him and i hope that as Deaf ethnicity is more and more understood and appreciated, DR / DVTV will incorporate it into their guidelines to give Deaf natural signed language folks an equal footing with other protected groups and organizations.

    I am sorry that you feel i did not treat u as an adult. If you care to copy and paste exactly what it is that i wrote that made you feel defensive or treated as a child – pls do. It will help me see things better. If you prefer not to – no problem. it is hard sometimes to see how our words are received by others when we have never ever met the other person and when their own words have hit us in ways that are not gentle or loving either.

    Re: your position on Marlee Matlin and the NAD gala – not only are you entitled but you also got some agreement from me so that is a good thing – me think, eh?
    id be willing to work on a letter to the NAD with ya commenting on our objection to them having Marlee be the big ticket item for the gala when folks have to shell out $120 a pop and she runs around fundraising for Hearing Aids and gets perks from being the Starkey strutter.

    RE: your not liking to give mixed messages – i do see a few in ur comments based on what i know u have done and said here and elsewhere BUT we are human. each and everyone of us so we must not be too demanding on ourselves and other.

    I do believe u r being sincere here in wanting Deaf-world folks to stand up and be counted on matters u feel count the most and i do have a much better understanding of how you feel now so again i thank u for this dialogue.



  13. Mark
    Apr 26, 2011 @ 02:42:11


    Thank you for bringing out the facts in the situations discussed here. It’s very good food for thought. What you say about NAD, I agree 100%. NAD is in my heart, but there was a big change after the early years, I question what they have stood for. It is disappointing that although NAD was originally established to preserve Deaf culture, language, and community, but after awhile the organization collaborated with AG Bell and Gallaudet college instead of standing against AG Bell’s philosophy. Eventually it seems the edicts of Milan even influenced the behavior of the NAD. I am trying to get the big picture of how this happened. I am wondering if it is possible that generational Deaf leaders failed to recognize the oppression on a level as their counterparts from hearing families did, and this caused a lack of strong stand against oralism and medical view in the past history of NAD.

    Penny, when you speak of “Ella and her people”, exactly whom do you mean? I can see through that comment that you feel Ella is the leader and people are following her. As for inviting Marlee to NAD event, I have nothing to speak against her, although I do believe she is causing divisions. Those of us on Deafhood journey know what’s the difference and leave her alone to show up or not which she must do for her reputation.

  14. handeyes
    Apr 26, 2011 @ 03:51:31

    mark – i typed ya a comment but it has gone poof. will check in tmw to see if it re-appears. if not then ill re-do it. not sure where it has run off to or if i closed me box before realizing i hadn’t click (post) first. clearly bed time.

    i do thank ya and in case i dont get back to it or it dont re-appear – in a nut-shell my assessment of what happened to NAD from 1920s to 1970s is Oralism (oral /aural ONLY) – nearly 2 generations worth of depriving Deaf folks of a natural and fully accessible language within academic settings took its toll on our skill sets, livelihood, emancipation, self-respect, industriousness, artistry, and self-governance. The interesting thing during this Dark era is the fact that:
    ASL survived
    Deaf folks survived
    NAD survived
    and once some form of signing was allowed back into the classrooms and public discourse we started to see a Renaissance and resurgence of the Deaf espirit

    then wham the 2nd wave of Oralism came a calling again but we be ready and getting busy

    NAD be waking up and we keep calling on them to stand tall

    ohh look i pretty much just re-wrote it minus the touchy stuff about the white gloves and being worried id drip on the NAD conference proceedings in the Gallaudet archives

    re: ur question to penny ill let her answer

    thanks again mark and i hope this reply sticks



  15. Penny
    Apr 26, 2011 @ 06:05:06

    I can understand why you and Mark thought I referred Ella as a leader. I never considered her as a leader or that she owned/controlled in the Deaf community. I never got that impression from her. What she shared in her most recent vlog “The Truth about me” was true. I agree everything she said in her vlog.

    What I mean by her group (I know who they are in and out and round about) is that they share/give input about Deaf issues or about our community first before they share to the public or with other people who are interested like me until much later time. I hate it. Their examples as being Deafhood is truly fake! I do not wish to go there and give examples as it would create further ugly scenarios.

    I was told by a good friend of mine that it is too bad that they do this because sooner or later they will be burnt out and go on their own way and no longer desire to improve our community which happened in the 60’s 70’s 80’s and 90’s. I used to let this bother me so much but not anymore. I do my own advocate work privately by writing important letters to important people. I will express in my own way. It works well for me now because I have my own say and empowerment. I no longer going to feel community pulse. It wastes my time.

    I am confused when you asked me not to support Tayler. I thought you have read my letter which you published and others on your blog to PURPLE. I shared that in public and did not hide anything from Tayler as I wouldn’t do that to him. I believe he has already read my letter. I have talked to him (for God how many times? Too many) about Audism and other issues about DVTV and Deafread. I also made a vlog that I was upset Tayler allowed one vlogger to use his voice without using ASL. I even brought my concern to Tayler via private e-mail. He replied that it was okay as long the vlogger uses ASL first and voice later with subtitle. We need to stop bother Tayler from now on about Audism and etc. He is a private ownership of DVTV and Deafread and there is nothing we can do about this. He has already made up his mind. It is sad but as long we did our part and now it is time for us to leave him alone.

    Again you and I do not agree about folks are turning a blinds eye or exhibiting favoritism or sending mixed messages. We need to stop here and not going back and forth on this because I still stand what I see.

    Whatever happened between you and Tayler is between you and him. I have no idea why he did not reply to some e-mails and does to others. He must have his own reasons. I never asked him about this as it is his private matter. I don’t care what name Tayler used before and now. It is very personal and it is none of my business. If he uses his name Tayler I will call him Tayler and not by another name.

    As for you treating me like a child…I don’t want to go back and forth on this but maybe it would help you to read what you said to me above and ask yourself if you would talk like that to your colleagues.

    To be honest with you, I am not interested to work with you to write a letter to NAD about Marlee because my intuition tells me that it would waste our time since I know they will not listen to us. If they prove us and make many dramatic changes in months ahead then I probably would reconsider and give it a try.

    I believe you said I have given mixed messages before which puzzled me so in the future if you see me doing that then pls get my attention. I feel that I have been the same ole Penny.

  16. handeyes
    Apr 26, 2011 @ 12:02:00

    penny –

    u r a gem to keep coming back for this dialogue and i thank u.

    1. re: the CA folks – i think i now understand what u r trying to say without saying. its taken me a bit to get there because u have not really been saying it directly. instead u focused on one person and not the folks u r directly taking issue with so i got confused about what this is about.

    i dont know the ins and outs there but i do know that some time folks make compromises and concessions and if im not in the thick of things its hard for me to see. i do think that the Oppose AB 2072 worked really well and hard together. very many different folks with very different and difficult histories and they did WELL to overcome that and much adversity to achieve their goal. it was not easy and it was not always pretty on the other side but they all held true and did good. by and large.

    so i still dont fully know what it is u r carrying there. i appreciate ur reservations and concerns but my read of things is that folks have come to REALLY good places to figuring out how to collaborate and work together and there are places that folks will never be inf full agreement on stuff but to find the common ground and hold to those is great. other folks may still dissent and people can still see the places they can and do come together on.

    2. re: tayler – pls re-read. i am NOT telling u to cut off communication with tayler – i was saying if we r to apply ur standard of all the CA folks should cut off the NAD or make a ruckus cuz of marlee at the gala etc then so could one argue should u re: tayler. i dont want that nor am i asking for it – im just holding up the mirror.

    i actually am happy u have said favorable things about tayler. i have never wished him any ill-will. i still believe deep in my heart that deep in his heart he is a good man. i would hug him in a minute. this will get many folks mad cuz his management has hurt and upset lots of folks but i believe that some day this core conflict will pass and he will shine to be truly who he is. a good guy who was in a really crappy place for a while. he has been bumped back and forth between various forces and he has had his own self-preservation ploys in full force.

    i hope and believe that when he asks himself what is the right, just and good thing to do – he will choose right and justly. it will not solve many of the problems facing our on-line community. i have seen the same folks that have troubled DR / DVTV trouble other systems. i have drawn the same conclusions tayler has had to draw on many things. i have really felt sadly to see him mistreated by others and i have felt sadly to see him publish and disseminate stuff that is unjust and untrue.

    i think we will get to this place of goodness. its just a very bumpy road to get there. now i might re-watch or re-read something that tayler said or did somewhere and give up hope again but for now i hope not. for now i hope he will appeal to the better angels of his nature.

    he has had a HARD job of it and im sure my activism has not made things any easier for him. I suspect this is the real place of our conflict. I suppose that in Tayler’s mind i am the enemy and i have been out to destroy him and his systems. I can see how he might connect the dots that way but if he looks at what i have said and done he will know that those dots are not mine. and know they do not connect or lead back to me. in a word he is being mislead.

    the conflict between DR and the Deaf community can be traced to the beginnings of DBC and when one person left after a few month and began a campaign to spread lies and falsehoods about DBC via using DR. (see all the DBC “Facts” vlogs which were untrue and carried by DR and recall how the 6 way aim chat was disseminated by DR by that individual and see the emails between that individual explaining how was plotting to have Deaf activists attacked via their workplace / affiliations and DBC dismantled)

    it went on and on and still goes on today. Falsehoods r a big part of cyber defamation and really shouldnt be carried on aggregators and systems especially in very small on-line communities. (this goes on both side – i dont support falsehoods and attacks)

    folks who want their stuff to be carried on DR / DVTV could easily be asked to sign an “AGREE” clause that their stuff does not contain falsehoods or attacks and then when something does DR / DVTV simply should remove that entry from their listing and adopt a three strikes ur out policy that they can consistently follow. i know folks will get slicky and always add a ? at the end of their falsehoods or a “just kidding” or a “its my opinion” and sure that is yawn and juvenile BUT it will mean that DR / DVTV has tried its best to set the tone and climate and asserted some parameters that folks will have to work within as to not overtly be used as a tool of disinformation and destruction

    no fun to have to monitor that stuff and would surely mean things would to quieter for some folks who want the sensational but it would make for a much more healthy diet and less broken windows in the neighborhood. yep they got a right to their opinion and DR / DVTV has the RIGHT NOT TO CARRY THAT CRAP. it is up to them. they could try it for a month and see the world spins fine and folks will return to DR / DVTV just as i hope many folks will return to NAD.

    ur advise re: dont challenge Tayler – i have adopted this policy since he made it abundantly clear that he was not going to honor his word and add audism or cultural / linguistic groups to the guidelines.

    i only mentioned him here because YOU did. smile. only because u introduced that old issue and i thought u would like to know the truths.

    now u r telling me NOT to so this is one of those confused mixed messages i was referring to. U have brought in a lot of stuff that does not have anything to do with the blog entry at all. u have typed in very ambiguous manners as not to mention “certain” people’s names yet u have named others overtly and then u say dont talk about it etc so….. its confusing but im a believer in things happening for reasons and seeing the good in things so im hopeful some good will come out of this exchange somehow some day.

    im a hoper – its what i do.

    re: ur having an advocacy method that works for u – that is fine with me. re: ur not wanting to write a letter about marlee at the NAD shinding because u dont think it will make any difference – gandhi said “Whatever you do may seem insignificant, but it is most important that you do it”

    this is a principle i try to live by but some days am too busy, too tired, too unsure, too perplexed, too ….. that i do not adhere to it but more often than not i do

    so ill take some time to reflex – my thinking is that a letter to marlee re: her promotion of starkey is more desirable and on the mark than anything to the NAD re: her invitation

    re: re-reading my comments to u – i have re-read and still do not see what words made u feel i was treating u as a child.

    re: how i talk to my colleagues – yep i do talk that way if there is just cause for it.

    i am not shy with the truths.

    now it may be a case of – text English versus face to face. i can assure u face to face i am no kitty cat but folks generally know what they are getting when dealing with Patti and most folks seem to appreciate that fact.

    with u penny – i have felt that it was worth it to be firm and direct. there was no intentions to diminish u and i am unsure of how i could have stated things differently. regardless i am very grateful for the dialogue

    much peace


  17. Penny
    Apr 26, 2011 @ 14:32:50


    I will read your comment again later and reply if needed. It was YOU who brought up Tayler and Misha Zena out of the blue first. I did not bring up their names. When YOU first brought up their names I thought you probably did not like my truth and tried to find other ways to put me down. I was not afraid to defend myself about Tayler. I went over my comments before you posted 12:03 am and I mentioned nothing—not one word about them until you did. I thought how odd and strange.

  18. Penny
    Apr 26, 2011 @ 15:06:32

    I read your comment again. I wanted you to know that I never claimed that the team did a poor job on AB 2307. When I learned that the team have already discussed and decided what to do about AB 2307 before they asked me to join them. I felt worthless and stupid that I am not important enough to share my input when they first set up meetings. I always think those kind of people are one big ugly and egoistic people. They are. I backed off IMMEDIATELY.I will not tolerate anyone to treat me like a shit. I had no desire to invest my energy after when they invited me to the group WAY much later.

    Honestly, I pity many many and many people in the Bay Area because I feel those kind of people are manipulators and use them for their own personal gains. They decide what they want to do and when they are ready then they asked for community if they want to join and help them—TO GET WHAT THEY WANT….NOT THEM. I pity my community and people out there. They are truly evils.

    I did not go off subject when you posted Truth and Failures. I only added one correction about Truth and then added another comment when Ella made hers. Then you jumped in and wrote a very very very long comment adding many issues and then that is where I had to reply to defend myself.

    I am done with this and I think we understand each other a little bit. I will not cease making comments in public.

  19. handeyes
    Apr 26, 2011 @ 16:10:36

    heye penny

    1. thank u for highlight that it was I, me, myself who first mentioned tayler. i do agree and do not deny that. when i wrote “only because u introduced that old issue and i thought u would like to know the truths.” i meant in terms of the whole DR and tayler thingy not my initial mentioning of your having trashed Tayler and Mishka Zena in the past (which was initially how i had used his name)

    i do do do really appreciate ur spelling out how all this has spelled out for u. i can now see more clearly how my initial words in the first comment made u feel defensive. I mentioned Amy, Tayler and Mishka Zena purely because those are the ways i recall having had exchanges with u in the past but now i see that by mentioning them there really is no way NOT to have a discussion of DR – OY!

    so my bad and while im grateful for the dialogue we have had on the subject i am sorry if it caused u or them any discomfort. There are some old and lingering issues that i truly do hope some folks can come to the table and discuss and find a common ground for agreement to move forward.

    my intention was just to be a heads up of i have seen how u approach folks and that has not been cool with me in the past but in doing so i made u feel on the defense and we opened a can of worms. oy

    re: your experiences with AB 2072 – thank u for sharing those feelings. Im sorry you had those feelings.
    Eleanor Roosevelt is quoted as having said: “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

    i know this is totally easier said than done – to not let bad experiences stick to us.

    i hope that u truly will know that u is good and if u got invited to the table too late in the process or if folks were less than receptive to ur input for whatever reason – they were already set with their plans or they were not on the same page with u or u were not in the inner clique etc – it was important for u to try.

    i really firmly believe this. it is important for us to try. Doesnt mean we will always succeed but much of our work is about planting seeds and later we will hopefully harvest the good stuff.

    I am sorry that for u it was a bitter experience and im glad that u can still see the good in the overall work and efforts they did.

    i do wnat to object to some of your statements such as:
    you wrote:
    “I always think those kind of people are one big ugly and egoistic people. They are.”
    “They are truly evils.”

    these are not FACTS but rather your opinions and feelings. you have every right to them but i do not feel it is morally right or accurate

    u reference your first comment correction but you still have not explained this “bay area new world order” i have asked u to clarify and u have chosen not to

    i still also do not see what you are CORRECTING about the blog entry – pls specify what statement you feel should be added or removed to the blog entry re: the truth about failures. i am still confused by that and have asked for clarification

    and yes we have hopped all over the blogsphere on this one smile

    again im putting me faith in the fact that sometimes things happen for a reason – to afford us an opportunity to uncover some things cuz there are old wounds and grudges and hurts etc.

    i do apologize if in anyway my direct confrontation right at the onset of this exchanged contributed further to any wounds. i am thankful that u have put ur truths on the table in terms of difficulties in collaborative activism. i hope u can find some folks in which to engage in social justice advocacy with. “A single twig breaks, but the bundle of twigs is strong”

    re: your last statement: “I will not cease making comments in public.”

    nobody has told u not to make comments in public.
    (added now – no one in this thread i mean. not sure what folks have said to u in other spaces etc)

    u have every right to disagree as do i. we also have every right to agree with each other. and we most especially have every right to seek out to do the right, just, and good thing.

    re: ur other ending statement “…I think we understand each other a little bit.”

    yes – i do believe this is very true and for that i thank you.



  20. Penny
    Apr 26, 2011 @ 18:00:08

    When you published your blog “Truth and Failures”…you were the one who listed many old and recent issues. When you mentioned that King Jordan brought new world order when he appointed Jane because both of them have same value “hear and speech”. I, Penny, also wanted to add that the Bay Area CA are bringing new world order too because they are inviting Marlee Matlin who value hear/speech to represent their beloved city. I hope you get it this time.

    I want you to know that I was not the only person who had rift with Amy, Tayler, Mishka Zena and others. There were MANY people who had rift with them in the past including you too.

    I no longer interested to work things out with some people in the Bay Area. I have zero trust in them. Pls honor my wish. I will let them take control and do projects on their own. Let others see for themselves eventually. I will do my own projects and making sure that my projects reveal to treat everyone equal…no favoritism, dirty work, bribing, and etc. This work is very important to me. Some people in Bay Area and I have different values.

    You can let them know that they did a fine job. They would love to hear that from you.

    Everyone including myself is entitled to opinions and feelings. They may be right to us but it will not always mean they would agree with us. As I get older, I no longer worry about if they like me or not. If they don’t like me…don’t like me. If they like me then like me. I despise wearing masks.

    Thank you, Patti

  21. handeyes
    Apr 26, 2011 @ 20:49:47

    Penny –

    Again i do thank u for coming back. i think i got it now!

    u wanted to add in that u feel the bay area CA folks have failed to protect Deaf cultural values because they are promoting Marlee being at the NAD event

    U feel that marlee is promoting the “new world order” manifesto that speaking and listening is crucial for success

    (if i flubbed any of that up – just holler)

    so now yep i do see how u were connecting things. sorry i didnt get that before as the entry was the truth about failures and now i see u consider Marlee being at the gala as a FAILURE by some folks for not objecting to that plan

    i hope i got it right finally

    i thank u for ur patience in walking me through that

    re: everything else u wrote – i respect ur wishes and ur path.

    re: masks – id dont care for them much meself either. another common ground we can stand on.

    re: what other folks think of us – as me brother always says “its none of our business” ; )

    i will tell u that i very much appreciate ur coming back and sharing and caring.

    thank you, Penny



  22. Penny
    Apr 26, 2011 @ 21:02:24

    Yes you got it now. I apologize if my first comment was not clear to you. I am implusive person and I tend to write down my feelings and click publish. Me bad habit. When I write a comment or letter, I need to remind myself to save it and come back to re read and see if my message is clear or not. I worked on important letter–lengthy one for 15 hours making many changes and etc. I had to ask three hearing people to read them making sure it was professional, fair and clear because I am implusive person. We got this solved. I got frustated because you said that I did not answer your question few times but now I got it.

    Thank to you too.

  23. Judy
    Apr 27, 2011 @ 00:42:12

    Whew! A lot to read here. Hearing parents though whose children have CIs, especially bilateral, think that their children are doing marvelously in reading and speech. They don’t care how it only makes their kids hear 50 -70% of everything or that they are HOH. They let the school systems talk them into just doing a 504 without interpreters to save the system money. They don’t take into consideration how frustrating the kids might be.

  24. handeyes
    Apr 27, 2011 @ 18:41:50

    penny – re: implusivity – seems the internet’s expediency can invite that tendency so again i appreciate ur time and also ur apology

    im learning the value of “breathe, breathe, breathe” meself too.

    re: ur proofreaders – my all time bestest ones happen to be Deaf but in general an extra set of eyes as with an extra set of hands often help. i dont always ask nor heed so my golden rule is if im unsure – just send the comment or note to myself first and if i still feel as strongly the next day or if it still rings to be just right and true – then go ahead and post.

    if it is more “passion” without “compassion” then i toss

    again thank u

    much peace


  25. handeyes
    Apr 27, 2011 @ 18:48:27

    judy –

    yep that is the pickle – folks having “just enough” to pass but still struggling. imagine my surprise when i learned “wow, u dont have to spend 24/7 working for ur words. u can actually learn this handeye language and have someone else do the handeye language back at ya and presto – its kinda like how it must work for Hearing folks – direct information in a fully natural and accessible manner

    radical, eh?

    i once went to a presentation on CIs and the expert was saying – “at best a CI will make the kids hard of hearing” then the next frame was “THE FORGOTTEN PEOPLE” and i was like wth – cuz me is physically hard of hearing and the expert explained that HOH folks are usually the first to fall through the cracks in the mainstream

    aint that the pickle “have-a-little-and-want-more” nah thanks me say if it is “more-of-the-same-ole-same-ole”

    been there done that and all i got was this lousy t-shirt ; )

    i know i know it aint funny cuz there are TOO many out there living that life treading water in the downstream and working for their words

    i just jest cuz if i dont – i will surely cry

    and sometimes i do

    cry a river and start building the mountain

    big thanks for ur comment judy



  26. Penny
    Apr 27, 2011 @ 20:12:33


    I thought about our dialogue for the past two days. I would like to make suggestion here. In the future, if you are not sure what the person is saying or comment isn’t clear or you need more information from him/her then please ask the person for clarification, or what does he/she mean by saying…etc instead of ramble on with old issues or even sharing issues between you and other person and things like that. It would be helpful if you just reply one or two sentences and ask for clarification which all my professors always did that with me and even students jumped in to clarify for me. Professors sometime were embarassed because students understood my question or comment and not them. It was fun. Students did not answer my questions but to defend me.

    As for using Deaf people to proofread my letter…I concur only if it is not confidential and I have used them in the past. If it is very personal or confidential then I must depend on hearing people to proofread so my letters stay here and not share with anyone. It all depend on the situation.

  27. Patti
    Apr 27, 2011 @ 23:33:14


    Thanks for ur suggestions



  28. PopeMistress
    Apr 28, 2011 @ 10:52:03

    Penny- FYI: we do have our own rights to express our thoughts about Marlee Matlin which means we do still like her but disagreed with her own way. Here’s the video for you to view on this link:

    I wonder why Marlee Matlin do not protect Gallaudet University to keep the 17 programs:

    Major degree programs to be closed

    * Ed.S. Change Leadership in Education
    * M.S. Administration
    * Ph.D. Special Education Administration
    * M.A. Deaf Studies: Deaf History
    * M.S. Leisure Services Administration
    * B.S. Computer Information Systems
    * B.A. Chemistry: Chemical Technology
    * B.A./B.S. Computer Science
    * B.A. French
    * B.A. International Government
    * B.A. Theatre Arts: Educational Drama

    Minor degree programs to be closed

    * Art History
    * Communication Studies/English: Journalism
    * French
    * German
    * Women’s Studies
    * Religion

  29. PopeMistress
    Apr 28, 2011 @ 11:00:55

    Hello Penny again- I do like Marlee Matlin but I do have my own right to disagree with her. Ok? Anyway I feel that the film maker did picked wrong person to perform a character role as Sarah Norman in the movie called “Children of a Lesser God” with only 2 reasons:
    1. Marlee Matlin did not grew up educating in Deaf Institution +
    2. do not have divorce parents!

    Many of us already know that she was educated in mainstream public schools and also has hearing parents who are still in marriage. OK? Also I do really have to respect that other Deaf person who express his own thoughts on this video link:

    Penny- the truth that I do not see Ella is trying to confuse us. Thank you!

  30. Penny
    Apr 28, 2011 @ 15:36:00


    I read your comments but I don’t have time to reply your questions or comments. I don’t want you to feel that I ignore your questions. I am going to be busy today to prepare for big project tomorrow. I hope others can give you feedback about programs cut at Gallaudet. I agree with you that everyone has right to appreciate Marlee’s work and time with Starkey Foundation and her involvement with the movie production world. I have no problem with that. You are entitled to your opinions about her work. Smile. I am done talking about my community who was involved with AB 2072 and their great admiration for Marlee’s work with Starkey. I don’t want to talk about it anymore. I am moving on. I am done with this discussion but thanks for leaving comments here for me.

  31. PopeMistress
    Apr 30, 2011 @ 10:26:45

    Ok-Penny! I’m sorry that I bother you again! It seems Gallaudet Univ had been cutting 17 programs but keep the Audiology Dept due to possibly of conflict of interest???? I just made my own less than a minute video link:

    Hope you will have a good weekend while I have to go work today!

  32. handeyes
    Apr 30, 2011 @ 11:02:43

    shawn –

    im kinda confused about why u r bringing in the Gallaudet stuff here but i was confused by Marlee and the NAD gala getting put in there too.

    this blog entry is about TRUTH ABOUT FAILURES

    it seems u and penny have extended it to want to include individuals who have failed to defend Deaf culture / ASL etc or whatever

    im still not incredibly clear because it seems several times removed from the direct sources of failing and if we r really going down that route we better start with ourselves and ask ourselves when we have failed to stand for justice on ALL issues and not be selective

    re: the Gallaudet programs – those were RECOMMENDATIONS – i believe that the outcome is that some of those listed programs will be maintained.

    Im assuming but i havent seen the latest FINAL decisions that the programs that will be chopped are ones with VERY LOW ENROLLMENT or LOW SUCCESS IN JOB PLACEMENT etc

    but i dont know the ins and outs of things at gallaudet

    i did receive an email that says the Theatre productions at Gallaudet are safe. I assume that means the Theatre degree is to remain but im checking on that.

    i was concerned about the M.A. Deaf Studies: Deaf History but got clarification that the MA in Deaf Studies is to remain. No one is proposing that be cut. the Deaf History track within the MA is being cut because of very low enrollment. That is a disappointment but hopefully it will inspire Gallaudet to muster up a better set of offerings in Deaf History at the BA level to eventually feed into a strong MA – Deaf History track

    re: ur link – ur last text is about Hurwitz being president of Gallaudet and an NAD member and u feel this is a conflict? Not really following this. Im pleased to see the president of Gallaudet being a member of the NAD.

    re: Hurwitz being a member of AG Bell – id love to see him boycott due to the Pepsi letter that AG Bell refuses to retract and apologize for.

    but that is me – im a civil disobedience kinda gal. i know several folks who are members of AG Bell and it aint always for the reasons u might think. me i cant and shant. not until they change the name of their organization and TRULY accept ASL

    so to each their own on that me think. our conscience shall be our guide

    and if anyone cares to return to the blog entry re: the TRUE failings in our community and not sink this down to an individualism level – that would be most welcome and appreciated

    NOTE: i only mentioned IKJ and JKF specifically because a WHOLE COLLECTIVE RESPONSE rose up to counter those actions and they indeed did FAIL

    ive just added the DPN and also an attempt to have John T Williams’ murder go unnoted



  33. Penny
    Apr 30, 2011 @ 16:27:22


    You talked about me. You admitted that you FINALLY understood my message about the very same people who fought for AB2072 and then brought New World Order back into fold again. You said I like to include or name people who failed to defend Deaf culture. I don’t kiss asses.

    Deaf schools are closing…AVT is on the rise and etc so we can’t afford giving mixed messages. Get it? Or are you still very confused? I find this odd because it is perfectly alright for you to talk about Barry, Tayler and others countless time in your blog but when I see something wrong about my community then you accused me for wanting to name individuals here. I mentioned the person name above but the rest I did not name others. I mentioned Region 4 team or the very same team who fought for AB 2072. Just like You said DVTV and Deafread failed…so I said Region 4 team failed too. I have every right to add who I think have failed to the Deaf community. You can say, Penny I disagree. I am still entitled to my opinion about adding or subtracting from your list about Failures. You can’t expect people who you admire for their work and dedication in our community do right all the times. NO!

  34. handeyes
    Apr 30, 2011 @ 17:01:10

    Penny I think u miaunderstood what I was trying to say to Shawn and have misunderstood what I was saying to u previously However because to re-explain would require length and because u have not asked me clarifying questions I will just leave it be.


  35. DE
    May 01, 2011 @ 18:26:31

    Patti- excellent framing here (your entry). This will go into the history records!

  36. handeyes
    May 13, 2011 @ 01:59:48

    heye DE

    sorry for the delay in replying. didnt see this one come in. re: the history records – well if i gotta be in the records it might as well be for the and with the truth.

    the truth rocks eh? and thank u


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